It’s officially a new year…so that means it’s time for a new me…right?
For the past 10 years my goals have relatively looked the same and while there has been a lot of personal growth- the main reason for that is that I haven’t quite completed most of them. This year (perhaps it’s because my frontal lobe is settling into my skull)- I’ve decided that constantly doing the same thing and expecting different results is silly…so this year we are doing things a little differently.
Maybe this year it’s more like- unlearning the crap that’s made me miserable.
1.Making a cheat sheet for decisions. When I am faced with a choice I want to remember that:
Curiosity > Apathy
Noticing > Judging
Creating > Consuming
Nurturing > Punishing
Consistency > Perfection
Taking Action > Worrying
Authenticity > Being Like
Life feels so damn complicated but really (at least for me) it really boils down to just that. A life full of apathy, judgement, consumption, punishment, perfection, worry, and fulfilling everyone else’s expectations other than my own- sounds quite frankly- MISERABLE. So why are those my default settings?
Whether its systematic, childhood, or some weird self-induced hell – I’m over it. So what do you do when what you are doing is making you hate your life? Naturally- the opposite.
- Starting with the question “Why am I not doing/being this already?”
Up until now, I have started the year with the overwhelming yet inspiring question “Who do I want to be?” or “What does my ideal life look like?”. The questions themselves are great- in fact knowing what you are aiming for is incredibly helpful when figuring out what to do next.
BUT- if you can invision who you want to be and how you want your life to look like…then the better thing to ask yourself is “Why haven’t you done/become/currently living like that yet?”. This question helps you identify the road blocks, the needed healing, or the things/people/places holding you back.
No matter how many goals, habits, or ideas you come up with- if all the things that have stopped you so far are still in your way…they will most likely stop you again. So- step one is removing the obstacles and then you can start building the life you want.
- Small Daily Non-Negotiables > Big Non-Negotiable Goals
Usually, I set myself up with giant goals that even if I make significant progress on them I still feel like a failure if I didn’t fully complete them. This year- I am making strong, small daily non-negotiables that no matter what kind of day I am having- are doable and inch me closer to the person I want to be.
Daily non-negotiables are highlighting small daily improvements as the success. Its a way to respect and prioritize the process over the result. And most importantly it centers the present rather than idolizing the future.
Taking these new mindsets into account- this is how I built my priorities and New Year’s resolutions for 2026.
- Daily Non-Negotiables
These are the daily tasks/habits that are the foundation of the person I would like to be and keep me grounded and healthy. If all I do this year is consistently do these things-its a win.
REMINDER: even if I struggle to do these some days- we are NOTICING not judging. (See what I did there?)
- Top Three Goals
I have 3 main goals this year. That’s it. They are doable, practical, and align with the life I want to live. This comes second to my daily non-negotiables.
- A Bucket List
This is where all the random ideas, mini side quests, aspirations go. These are not do or die. This is the “how awesome would this be” things go like
- Do a full pullup
- Take a road trip
- Paint a duck
I do not need to stress, or judge, or achieve any of these things. But I wanted a place to put and acknowledge all the desires I have without adding unnecessary struggle to my life.
As someone who is always coming up with little hobbit side quests and as I get to know myself- I really struggle to identify what is the priority. This system has been helping me to stay on track, actually make progress, and still honor the fact that I am multi-faceted.
So- this year maybe its not about becoming a whole new me…but rather unbecoming what I was told I should be and finally stepping into the version of myself that was always there under the surface.
-KR